Guess Who's 4.....

Four years ago today a woman halfway around the world faced one of the scariest days of her life.  Her water unexpectantly broke WAY to early.  And she gave birth to a very tiny baby boy whom she named Jae-min.  She then made the unselfish, heartbreaking decision to relinquish this beautiful baby boy to another family...a family who had been waiting for a baby.

I can't help but think of her today and the emotions she experienced on that day four years ago.  Did she hold this sweet baby?  Did she put her hand inside his tiny incubator and touch his delicate skin?  Did she tell him just how much she loved him, but needed to let him go?  Did she pray that he would have a good life and that he would be loved beyond measure?  Did she kiss his sweet cheeks and whisper in his ear?

On his day of birth I think of her so often and wonder if she is thinking of him too today.  I wonder if somehow she knows what a kind, funny, sweet, loving boy she gave birth to and how much he is loved and cherished.  I always say that if I had a genie and he gave me a wish it would be to meet both of my children's birth mothers.  To sit in a room and look into the face of the woman who gave birth to my two amazing gifts would be an honor.  To hear their stories and see their souls and share their tears would humble me.

This weekend will be a time of celebration in our family.  A time to celebrate 4 years of life of this amazing little boy....

But today is a day of reflection....to remember the woman whose sadness gave me happiness....because through her sorrow she made me a mother.
Tonight as Jae-min was taking a bath I commented that he used to be my little tiny baby.  And his response was "I'll always be your baby mamma"  Melt. my. heart.
And when I tucked him in tonight he said "guess how much I love you"  "to the moon and back, and to Korea to"..